<Wiccan Reporter> OK, my log file is rolling and the interview is now in session. I am interviewing Beestie, a former Wiccan High Priest who is now a Christian.

<Beestie> Before we get to me, I need to ask you a quick question. I went to the web site that is linked to from your web page on the paper’s web site. Did you write the poems on that page?

<Wiccan Reporter> Yes.

<Beestie> They sound as if something is missing from your life . . . in fact, they sound quite familiar--thoughts I once had...

<Wiccan Reporter> Really?

<Beestie> Yes. I kept reaching out and was touched not by the goddess. I won't badger you about it, but think about where you are on your current path.

<Wiccan Reporter> Wow. OK. So, how did you get away from all of it?

<Beestie> Hmm, it was not easy. I started off by hanging out in an internet chat channel called #ChristianHope here when it was on a net that was very worldly. The other channels I hung out in on the same net were all Wiccan. Anyway, I found a group of people who liked me not for who I was, but for who I could be and who GOD said I was.

<Wiccan Reporter> As a matter of fact, I have been thinking about the path I’m on . . . heh. I’m on a Christian server aren’t I?

<Beestie> Yes you are, and it is no accident that you were talking in my channel...

<Wiccan Reporter> Well--that just put goose-bumps up my arm. Thanks a lot! LOL!

<Beestie> And yes, some Christians are MAJOR lamers. The ones I *still* refer to as the "Jesus Glee Club." Those are the ones who preach hate and ignorance.

<Wiccan Reporter> Yes!

<Beestie> But we cannot judge God by what a bunch of humans do. God is ever so much more than we can ever hope to be. And He had plans for me, and I know he has plans for you. He has plans for all of us. Plans for the purposes of good, not evil.

<Wiccan Reporter> But what if you’re like me and have been trying all your life to get him to help you--and he never has? I never hamper, hinder or harm.

<Beestie> He always answers ALL my prayers. Sadly, He knows better than myself what I need and sometimes His answer to my prayers is no. As for you statement of not causing harm or hindering--you don't know that. I thought the same thing when I was Wiccan... "An it harm none, do what ye will..." The Wiccan Rede.

<Wiccan Reporter> Hmm...

<Beestie> Who am I to judge whether or not my actions harm another? And why should he answer my prayers when I was not serving Him and His will.

<Wiccan Reporter> Even if you were little--and had done no wrong? What if you were little and praying to Him and He still didn’t answer?

<Beestie> I left Him when I was 8 years old because he was not answering me to my satisfaction.

<Wiccan Reporter> Eight?

<Beestie> Yes, eight years old. I learned about evil Christians when I went around with my family pastor. To this day (if he is still alive) he is missing a chunk out of the fleshy part of the base of his right thumb where he grabbed me and I bit him.

<Wiccan Reporter> I know about evil Christians, too.

<Beestie> After renouncing my Christianity, I wandered around for a few years as an agnostic. Then I fell in with some Satanists for a couple years and found they were too stupid. I needed rules. The Satanic Rede of, "Do what you will" was too loose for me. Then the Wiccan Rede pulled me in and I stayed a Wiccan for over 20 years. But when it came down to it, Wicca was not enough, either. Mind you, I still have things go awry--but I am at peace with Him and the World. I have an inner peace that was missing when I was on the Wiccan path. (By the way, let me know if I get too pushy... I remember how that was when I was searching and began to talk to Christians...)

<Wiccan Reporter> I once lived with one who taught grownups Sunday School--then would come home and mess with me in ways they never knew. I hated Christians, but I kept praying to Jesus that he would make all of them stop. He never answered me. When I finally ran away, the people I live with now took me in and taught me their ways. I’ve been Wiccan for three years now. (And you’re not being pushy.)

<Beestie> I thought you had been hurt. Your poetry on your web page sounded like it. I know the hurt . . . there is evil in the world and it hides under the Christian name as well as every other religion.

<Wiccan Reporter> I am surprised--you don’t know what happened or cared what happened to your coven?

<Beestie> No. They pretty much had turned from me before I left. I was not on their path anymore, so they "culled" me from their lives.

<Wiccan Reporter> I see. So it is not like you just took off and left them wondering what happened then?

<Beestie> No. They knew ahead of time and made their own choice. I never burned any bridges there. My relationships with them I had left open--if they wished to keep me as a friend.

<Wiccan Reporter> How long did it take you--to find your truth in all of this?

<Beestie> Hmm--I think I seriously began to think about Christianity about 6 months before I gave myself to Yeshua (Jesus). But I had become disheartened with Wicca about 2 years before that. I was in limbo, so to speak, for that long.

<Wiccan Reporter> Wow!

<Beestie> Not Wiccan, not Christian . . . not anything. Just on my own. And that hurt more than anything else.

<Wiccan Reporter> Sitting on the fence!

<Beestie> Exactly. Now I know who owns the fence, and I don't want any part of it. (Lucifer owns it, by the way.)

<Wiccan Reporter> Ack! Heh!

<Beestie> There is a joke that explains that in better terms than I just typed it.

<Wiccan Reporter> A joke?

<Beestie> Yes. Short story, study, anecdote--whatever one would call it.

<Wiccan Reporter> May I read it?

<Beestie> Erk--OK, let me pull it up from my files. hang on a sec.

<Wiccan Reporter> No. It’s OK if you cannot find it. I was just curious.

<Beestie> Found it. Here it is: There was a large group of people. On one side of the group stood Jesus. On the other side of the group stood Satan. Separating them, running through the group, was a fence. The scene set, both Jesus and Satan began calling to the people in the group and, one by one--each having made up his or her own mind--each went to either Jesus or Satan. This kept going. Soon enough, Jesus had gathered around him a group of people from the larger crowd, as did Satan. But one man joined neither group. He climbed the fence that was there between the groups and sat on it. Then Jesus and his people left and disappeared. So, too, did Satan and his people. And the man on the fence sat alone. As this man sat, Satan came back, looking for something which he appeared to have lost. The man said, "Have you lost something?" Satan looked straight at him and replied, "No, there you are. Come with me." "But," said the man, "I sat on the fence. I chose neither you nor him." "That's okay," said Satan. "I own the fence."

<Wiccan Reporter> Wow . . . is all I can say. I guess that I never looked at it quite that way. Thank you for sharing that with me.

<Beestie> But, (continuing,) my path to follow Yeshua was not an easy one to follow, either.

<Wiccan Reporter> Your path is what I’d like to hear about. I am surprised your Christian wife stayed married to you--since you were Wiccan.

<Beestie> It was not her choice. Plus part of what had transpired in bringing me to Yeshua was that I almost lost her and my kids. But God told her that if she left me, I would never come to know Him. "Yeah, my wife was a *Christian* and look what *she* did to me..."

<Wiccan Reporter> Oh, I see.

<Beestie> So we worked it out. Marriage is a covenant before God, and He did not want it broken no matter what faith I was.

<Wiccan Reporter> Wow.

<Beestie> Besides, He already knew I was His. All that was left was for Him to reel me in.

<Wiccan Reporter> Interesting.

<Beestie> He knew you before you were born. He went to the cross and died for your sins before you were born--and I am starting to Bible thump, aren't I?

<Wiccan Reporter> Yes you are. Well, this has been fun, but not helpful. I’ll be moving on now. Nice chatting with you. Merry part.

<Beestie> What is wrong? You said earlier when you asked to interview me that you wanted to know my thoughts on how I went from being a witch to Christian. If you have questions that I have not answered, pop them out there so I can get to them.

<Wiccan Reporter> I’m not quite sure what line of questioning to take with this.

<Beestie> OK. So what would you like to hear or discuss, or have help with? You have my undivided attention.

<Wiccan Reporter> Erm, that wasn’t my intention.

<Beestie> That's OK, you’ve gotten it anyway.

<Wiccan Reporter> Well, now I’m on the spot huh? I really have no idea.

<Beestie> Not on the spot, but if what we are discussing is not helpful, then you must have some idea of what you want/need.

<Wiccan Reporter> Well, I can play around and listen to Bible thumping just about anywhere.

<Beestie> I know . . . but not with a Christian who cares deeply about you.

<Wiccan Reporter> Yes, well, you don’t know me at all, really.

<Beestie> Granted, but I know who God says you are. That is enough.

<Wiccan Reporter> OK. And all I know about you is a little bit of who or what you were.

<Beestie> May I ask a quick question? About your faith? Then you can know anything about me you want to know. I have nothing in my past or present that I need to hide.

<Wiccan Reporter> I don’t know how you got from there to here.

<Beestie> Ah, OK. You need my whole testimony.

<Wiccan Reporter> Er, um...

<Beestie> The one I never got off my lazy butt to write...

<Wiccan Reporter> I don’t know--maybe. I’m just curious.

<Beestie> Do you want to know how to break from Wicca and become a Christian? Or what drove me from Wicca to Yeshua?

<Wiccan Reporter> Both, really. That and what kind of stuff you did as a Wiccan, you know? To see if what you did was similar to what I am into.

<Beestie> OK. Part one. I was a solitary Wiccan for many years to begin with. I did not agree with the beliefs of many of the covens in my area. Most wanted me to do the Great Rite with their priestess before I could be a full member. [The Great Rite would involve me having sexual intercourse with the female priestess. -- Ed] Sorry, not me.

<Wiccan Reporter> OK.

<Beestie> When I said, "Till death do us part," with my wife, I *meant* it. As a solitary Wiccan I was into candle magic and other “white” spells--all intended to influence what happened to me and mine and protect me from those without trying to harm us. Now, remember that before all this I was a Satanist, so I wanted to stay as “white” as I could.

<Wiccan Reporter> OK.

<Beestie> Eventually, I found a group that was not into the sex thing--or rather, they were not after the women drove off their former high priest. *He* was. Since I knew more about Wicca than the rest, and had known them all for a while, and they trusted me, I was "elected" to be their new high priest after they spoke to the goddess. I thought this was grand! I had power and admiration--adulation even!

<Wiccan Reporter> Yes.

<Beestie> But it was hollow. I can't explain how I knew this, but I knew in my heart that it was all an act--so I began to search again. At this point my wife asked me to start hanging out in #ChristianHope. My gut reaction was, “No way! Christians? I've met *that* crowd before!”

<Wiccan Reporter> Heh! I know the feeling.

<Beestie> I had gotten the crap beat out of me by a "Man of God" in the past. No thanks! But she told me that he was not a true Christian and to give this crowd a try. She needed me to be head of the household spiritually, even if our faiths were different. Now, mind you, at the time my nick was the Beast.

<Wiccan Reporter> Wow.

<Beestie> Not very Christian. We got a lot of grief from many members of the channel when I began to hang out in it. Got banned a couple times to for not changing my nick. "You're EVIL!" was the cry. Then my wife (who was one of the founders in the channel) OPped me [Made me one of the channel operators, or moderators. -- Ed] She had several of the other OPs quit over that decision. But she could not be in authority over me and still minister. That is not in God's plans. Meanwhile, I struggled for a while with all of this. Not a Christian, but no longer truly Wiccan. I was set apart from both. Then my life really began to fall apart. I screwed up my left knee and lost my military career over it. I prayed and prayed to the goddess for healing and nothing happened. After that, I almost lost my marriage because the strain of being out of work--and not being of her faith began to drive her away from me. I was horrible with my own kids . . . still in a military mind-set, I barked orders at them, constantly. Then, our car died. Then we got notice from our landlord--”30 days, get out. I'm selling the house out from under you.” So here I was, no car, no job, almost no family, and now no house.

<Wiccan Reporter> Wow!

<Beestie> Please bear with me--this all still hurts. It was only 2 years ago... I was on my face over and over to the goddess and there was nothing there for me. She was hollow. A pipe dream. No answer. All my “magyk,” all my knowledge was for nothing. It did not help. Wow--I'm shaking. (deep breath, Beestie...)

<Wiccan Reporter> I’m sorry. You can stop if you want.

<Beestie> No, you need to hear this. So one night while we were packing the house up for storage, we went on-line into the chat channel while having a dinner break. One of our good friends was there--one who didn’t care how evil I was. She said, “Would you mind if I prayed over your situation? And would you at least sit and listen?” I was at my wits’ end--nowhere to turn. Nowhere to hide. Honestly without hope. So I said, “Sure. What have I got to lose?” As she (yes, she) prayed over me, a peace entered my heart. It told me that no matter how far I had strayed from Him, he still loved me. He still wanted me back. Everything I had done--the persecution I had done to His people--spitting on them--hating them--sending them porno stuff in the mail--throwing rotten eggs on them--all of it would be forgotten. He loved me. He wanted to help me. All I had to do was to un-harden my heart to Him and let Him in. Not those who preached hate in His name, but let *Him* in. So, hands trembling, tears streaming down my face, I said, “Yes!” The love and peace that flooded me were phenomenal! I was still broken, but it was all right. I had a Rock to build a foundation upon--someone who cared about me so deeply that He had died for me without ever meeting me personally. Someone who had plans for me--not plans of what man wanted me to do, plans of what He wanted me to do--love Him back. Help others in pain in His name. Spread His word to those willing to hear it, and to glorify His name. So I accepted His peace--His Shalom and His love. It has not been a cake-walk, afterwards. At first, it felt like a new coat made of wool. It itched.

<Wiccan Reporter> Heh!

<Beestie> But gradually, it has gotten easier to wear. Now, Hasatan has fought me tooth and nail. The first time I went out and bought a Bible I got a physical spiritual attack.

<Wiccan Reporter> How?

<Beestie> I walked into that Bible store and it felt like I was walking into the depths of Hell itself. I was hot and sick to my stomach. There was an actual wall of heat that I hit the *second* I entered that store. But with prayer, and my wife's spiritual cover, we prevailed and I bought a Bible. I am still tempted by Hasatan constantly.

<Wiccan Reporter> How?

<Beestie> I cannot look at the moon without yearning for the goddess and what was. I see “Merry Meet” or “Merry Part” or “Blessed Be” in the chat rooms and it calls out to me . . . “Come back...” But that path leads to death eternal. It leads away from Him. Life eternal. I have to constantly remind myself just how hollow Wicca was. Also remember, I am still a "baby Christian." I have only been saved 2 years *this* March. So I still struggle with it.

<Wiccan Reporter> OK.

<Beestie> Some days I get angry with Him. But after I calm down, I realize it is me, not Him. I am not listening to Him, or not walking in His light or any of a number of things *I* am doing wrong. But He still loves me, and still forgives me for all I do.

<Wiccan Reporter> You do?

<Beestie> Oh yes. We all get angry with Him. You should see it over and over in the bible. But he keeps pushing us--strengthening our faith muscles. But He never gives us more than we can handle--as long as we put our trust in Him. I still have no car. I still have no house--we live in a motel/efficiency.

<Wiccan Reporter> Wow!

<Beestie> I make around $5.75 an hour at a local grocery store. But do you know what?

<Wiccan Reporter> What?

<Beestie> I have an inner peace that I never had before. I don't care about all of that because He loves me and is caring for me and mine. All our needs are met--OK, sometimes at the very last second. Many are the times when rent is so far behind we are about to get evicted. But somehow, we get the money--sometimes from anonymous donors. He provides. I trust. My wife and I still fight. I still bark orders at the kids. But not as much as before. I am becoming a new man in Him. Calmer. More loving. Our marriage is closer than it ever was. And all I had to do was open my heart and my life to Him--Jesus the Messiah, Yeshua Ha Mashiach.

<Wiccan Reporter> So do you go to church?

<Beestie> Not as often as I should, but we minister on-line quite a lot, so we get our fellowship there. My town has very few churches that are not of the old "glee club" style that drove me away from Him.

<Wiccan Reporter> OK.

<Beestie> So we hang out in #ChristianHope with folks who love Him like we do. We test all that is said in His name against what is written in the Bible.

<Wiccan Reporter> OK.

<Beestie> If it is not in the Bible--it is not of Him. You would be shocked just how much is done in His name that is *not* in the bible (or maybe you would not be so shocked...)

<Wiccan Reporter> I don’t know--what is not in the Bible?

<Beestie> Umm, for instance, all those people rolling on the floor, "talking in tongues," and it all sounds like turkeys gobbling or dogs barking? That is not in the Bible.

<Wiccan Reporter> I thought it was.

<Beestie> Nope. Talking in tongues is, but not like that.

<Wiccan Reporter> OK.

<Beestie> It would be more like me preaching in English, and someone who only speaks Spanish understanding every word I said--that is true Biblical tongues. They hear me in their own tongue.

<Wiccan Reporter> OK. I think I understand what you are saying. So, what is the rolling on the floor then? Satan?

<Beestie> That, or people looking for attention. Some are “taught” to do it that way.

<Wiccan Reporter> OK.

<Beestie> Let me ask you--are you concerned about all this because you want to make a decision, but fear doing it because of the household you live in?

<Wiccan Reporter> Some of it, yes.

<Beestie> Mmm, yes. Would they drive you out?

<Wiccan Reporter> Oh yes.

<Beestie> I ran into that... I got "excommunicated" by my own coven. But it is *your* decision... One *you* need to make.

<Wiccan Reporter> The household where I live is only a small part of it, though.

<Beestie> OK, what else?

<Wiccan Reporter> Erm...

<Beestie> As much as I would love to see you accept Him...

<Wiccan Reporter> I hate your g-d for never being there for me. Letting my life be chosen as it has, many nights crying out to him--and nothing but silence. That hollowness that you speak of is how I look at him. That I have not been and will never be his.

<Beestie> Ah...

<Wiccan Reporter> That, and He is male.

<Beestie> How I first saw Him after what I went through... The maleness did bother me, too. I went to the goddess *because* she was a she. I hated men after being beaten by one.

<Wiccan Reporter> Yes!

<Beestie> Even though I was a male. I hated myself for being male but not male enough to stand up and defend myself. I never had to go through what I think you have gone through, but pain is pain and evil is evil.

<Wiccan Reporter> You are lucky, then.

<Beestie> The free choice that Wiccans so love is the same free choice that these evil people have to give you/me pain... To take away their free choice is to take away our own--which is what you were asking God to do in your past--when you were asking Him to deal with your pain.

<Wiccan Reporter> I don’t think a person can be a Christian and love Jesus but *hate* his Father.

<Beestie> They are one and the same, Jesus is God the Father. He does not fear our anger. Read the free choice statement again, if you would... It is about why He did not stop your pain. And they (those who hurt you) *will* be judged by Him, just in His time frame, not ours. And His promise to us is that we get to be there for it.

<Wiccan Reporter> We do?

<Beestie> Yes. It is in Psalm 34--forget what verse... And I still get hurt by "Christians" and He lets it happen. He cannot take away their free will without taking mine away, too.

<Wiccan Reporter> Why does he allow that, then?

<Beestie> He uses it to mature us. To stop it is to make us all robots. He cannot take away the free will of one without taking it away from all of us.

<Wiccan Reporter> Hmm, OK.

<Beestie> What he promises is that what Hasatan means for evil, he will make into good and use for our good in the long run. And eventually, judgment is coming. *His* judgment is *not* pretty! You think our anger is bad, imagine *His* anger!

<Wiccan Reporter> No thanks!

<Beestie> Think of Sodom and Gomorra! But He freely forgives those who turn to Him, and repent of what they have done in the past and let Him change us. So, I'm going to let you think about all of this for now. I know when I was searching, I had to think about what I had learned. Too much and I quit hearing, y'know? Any other questions or concerns?

<Wiccan Reporter> You mentioned Sodom and Gomorra--I have a question on those cities.

<Beestie> I bet it has to do with God killing all of the kids too, yes?

<Wiccan Reporter> Yes. You already knew what I was going to ask.

<Beestie> We know for a fact that there were no innocents in either city, because He promised Abraham that he would save the cities if there were found to be at least 10 innocents in them. And the only ones found were Lot and his family and He sent angels to save them by removing them.

<Wiccan Reporter> There had to be kids there! It was a city!

<Beestie> No, it was like what we would think of as . . . a red light district. Two whole cities of red light district. Children were not allowed in them, or we just as evil if they were in them.

<Wiccan Reporter> I didn’t know that.

<Beestie> God knew their hearts and that they would never accept Him.

<Wiccan Reporter> OK.

<Beestie> And even if there *were* innocents there, to die would be removed from the pain of living in that life and to live with Him. That is not punishment--we do not fear death!

<Wiccan Reporter> OK.

<Beestie> When God sent the angels to Lot’s house, the crowd wanted to have homosexual relationships with the angels. This was not a rational/sane crowd. The evil was deep.

<Wiccan Reporter> I never read it only heard about it.

<Beestie> That is part of embracing Him--reading His word--and it may be part of your struggle--only knowing of Him and His word by word of mouth from others. I had the same problem over and over... "I didn't know that...” “But I thought *this* happened instead..." etc.

<Wiccan Reporter> I see. I will keep it in mind.

<Beestie> For instance, you know how all the Christmas stories have Mary riding to Jerusalem on Joseph's donkey?

<Wiccan Reporter> Yes.

<Beestie> No where in the Bible is that mentioned.

<Wiccan Reporter> Oh yeah?

<Beestie> Not one donkey.

<Wiccan Reporter> That’s too funny!

<Beestie> But people accept these things as Christian beliefs and they are not.

<Wiccan Reporter> Well, I think I have taken up enough of your time for one night. I would like to continue this at a later time--I have pockets full of questions!

<Beestie> OK, I have lots of answers. I hope they match!

<Wiccan Reporter> Me, too!

<Beestie> I’ve enjoyed chatting with you.

<Wiccan Reporter> Thank you.

<Beestie> It is good for me, too.

<Wiccan Reporter> Uh, how come?

<Beestie> To go over in my heart and mind what I have learned and share it with someone who needs it.

<Wiccan Reporter> Good for you?

<Beestie> Yes, to share out a testimony and how God touched our lives is very special. I understand so much of what you are going through.

<Wiccan Reporter> I don’t know what to say.

<Beestie> Don’t try to find anything to say. Just know that we care about you a lot, and want to help you find Him in your life.

<Wiccan Reporter> Well, again thank you for your time.

<Beestie> My pleasure. God bless.